All she ever talks about is herself, her fantasy-life of mistreatment, and her cat. I mean it's reddit and your account, I get it you should talk about yourself, but she talks about her family in many posts. But never me. Not to seem like I'm the center of the universe or anything, but I think that if your sister gets cancer you shouldn't act like she doesn't exist. Which she basically says a few times in posts after I was diagnosed that there is "no family" nearby. I LIVE 30 MINUTES AWAY! But around the time I was diagnosed with cancer and my family came down to visit, she told me that she posted on there about helpful donations for my health. After perusing her entire post history, I can safely say that she never did. On my surgery day she was not there, why? Because she had to help with a documentary that day. It was not job related or school related. It was for her ex-boyfriend. All she thinks about is herself and ways to make her facade look better to others.
This is what one of her posts read:
"I'm the youngest of five kids. Throughout my 22 years, I've watched my parents bend over backwards for my siblings. I was made to get a job at 16 and start providing for myself, while my 20 year old sister was financially cared for. I had to buy my own car, while my parents paid half for theirs... the list goes on. I would never expect my parents to buy me things like a car, or pay for my schooling, but it certainly rubbed me the wrong way when they did it so readily for my siblings.
It's caused some disagreements between my parents and I. I had to
move out when I was 19, but my 25 and 29 year old brother still live at
home. They're also completely financially supported by my parents.
During hard financial times, I asked my parents if they could lend me
some money until my next payday, and they said no because they needed to
buy groceries for my 25 year old (unemployed) sister.
It's hard to not see the favoritism in these kind of situations. It's hard not to wonder why your parents wouldn't go to the same lengths for you, and if they care about you the same way they do for their other children. You have to have a conversation with them about this. Do it as non-confrontational as possible. Don't make accusations right away, and use I-statements. Let them know what your perception is and ask what is theirs. I wish you luck, and I'm sorry this is an issue for you."
To note, some of these ages are way wrong as the brother that's 10 years older than her moved out of the house long before she was 19. Okay, first off only three of us have cars, my two younger sisters and my oldest brother. My parents helped my oldest brother with his first car and schooling because they were financially able to and they planned to help us others out when we came to college and car, but couldn't (My parents have now moved three times since then). My oldest brother also got cutoff due to buying expensive items like designer brand shirts and he was warned many times. It didn't take too long and they cut him off. The car situation was bad as my dad cosigned for it and when my brother didn't pay for the car, it forced my dad to pay for it.
My older brother who is 8 years older than my youngest sister didn't ask for much when he was younger. He never had a car or a job due to medical issues, but gets help from the government, so my parents don't provide for him. Well other than a roof over his head and driving him to places, which doesn't happen much.
For myself, again, no car and I had to pay for my cellphone as soon as I got one. Both of my sisters got free cell phones when they were in school and they were told if someone got a job, one of the phones goes to the working person. I started working and I got no phone, it took me a little over half a year to get a cell phone and I had to pay for it right away. I was bad with my money, so I was already cut off and I had to pay for my personal items and sometimes my special foods (stuff that no one else ate in the house) as well, so I'm not complaining (back then I did, but today I find it understanding). If you are a reader of my blog, you would know I started college last year and getting no help from my parents not even for my medical bills. Well take that back, my parents paid for my Phi Theta Kappa entrance fee as a gift. My parents can't afford helping me out and I know they want to, but I know they can't as well as they have too much on their plate already. I do thank them for being there for me and still there for me. I love them so much.
My younger sister, who is three years older than my youngest sister, had a job and was paying for her stuff. My parents plan was to pay for driving school for us kids when we were ready and also if we got a GM car my dad would help with the down payment since he had points with his company for GM cars. So my dad helped with a down payment on a car and my sister was paying for it. Then in May my sister, who was 21 at the time, went into the hospital for a month (we think it was a major breakdown now, but not sure) and we thought she was going to die. Due to health issues and not being able to work much, my dad has helped her pay bills and her car. Right now they are working on trying to get disability for her in hopes to relieve the financial stress on her and my parents. She's the only one my parents are currently supporting right now. The money for the bills and her car were not gifts, but IOUs that my sister will have to pay back.
My youngest sister had been baby'ed a lot over her lifetime. Both she and the other sister got the cell phones, got to pierce their ears while being under 18/still living at home, got my mom to buy them CDs every week (I wanted comics/manga [Japanese comics] and my mom never brought me one... and they were cheaper too), and among other things. My sister also had a lawsuit with a car insurance company and won a large among of money, which was used to pay for college and her car... she had also saved money from work, so my parents didn't need to help her when it came to this moment in her life. On top of that by that time my parents couldn't afford to help her. She was forced to get a job because she wanted to home school and my mom warned her that was going to happen. My sister made that choice, not my parents. Anytime she asked my parents for money for food or any kind of help, it usually turns out she needed it for a tattoo that she didn't need at that moment or most likely drugs (yes I know she's doing drugs... seen it at her place and she admits it too). Of course, after awhile people will say no to the borrowing if they know it's not for a needed thing. Though my parents did borrow money from her to help them get their current house, with the history of her blowing thousands of dollars away so fast, of course, my parents are afraid to give her money back so fast (well first off they don't really have the money to give anyways).
My parents may not be perfect, no one is, but to lie so much about not getting any kind of help is unbelievable. Be happy you had a place to call home, a bed to sleep in, a roof over your head, clothes on your person, and food on your plate, you ungrateful brat.
It's hard to not see the favoritism in these kind of situations. It's hard not to wonder why your parents wouldn't go to the same lengths for you, and if they care about you the same way they do for their other children. You have to have a conversation with them about this. Do it as non-confrontational as possible. Don't make accusations right away, and use I-statements. Let them know what your perception is and ask what is theirs. I wish you luck, and I'm sorry this is an issue for you."
To note, some of these ages are way wrong as the brother that's 10 years older than her moved out of the house long before she was 19. Okay, first off only three of us have cars, my two younger sisters and my oldest brother. My parents helped my oldest brother with his first car and schooling because they were financially able to and they planned to help us others out when we came to college and car, but couldn't (My parents have now moved three times since then). My oldest brother also got cutoff due to buying expensive items like designer brand shirts and he was warned many times. It didn't take too long and they cut him off. The car situation was bad as my dad cosigned for it and when my brother didn't pay for the car, it forced my dad to pay for it.
My older brother who is 8 years older than my youngest sister didn't ask for much when he was younger. He never had a car or a job due to medical issues, but gets help from the government, so my parents don't provide for him. Well other than a roof over his head and driving him to places, which doesn't happen much.
For myself, again, no car and I had to pay for my cellphone as soon as I got one. Both of my sisters got free cell phones when they were in school and they were told if someone got a job, one of the phones goes to the working person. I started working and I got no phone, it took me a little over half a year to get a cell phone and I had to pay for it right away. I was bad with my money, so I was already cut off and I had to pay for my personal items and sometimes my special foods (stuff that no one else ate in the house) as well, so I'm not complaining (back then I did, but today I find it understanding). If you are a reader of my blog, you would know I started college last year and getting no help from my parents not even for my medical bills. Well take that back, my parents paid for my Phi Theta Kappa entrance fee as a gift. My parents can't afford helping me out and I know they want to, but I know they can't as well as they have too much on their plate already. I do thank them for being there for me and still there for me. I love them so much.
My younger sister, who is three years older than my youngest sister, had a job and was paying for her stuff. My parents plan was to pay for driving school for us kids when we were ready and also if we got a GM car my dad would help with the down payment since he had points with his company for GM cars. So my dad helped with a down payment on a car and my sister was paying for it. Then in May my sister, who was 21 at the time, went into the hospital for a month (we think it was a major breakdown now, but not sure) and we thought she was going to die. Due to health issues and not being able to work much, my dad has helped her pay bills and her car. Right now they are working on trying to get disability for her in hopes to relieve the financial stress on her and my parents. She's the only one my parents are currently supporting right now. The money for the bills and her car were not gifts, but IOUs that my sister will have to pay back.
My youngest sister had been baby'ed a lot over her lifetime. Both she and the other sister got the cell phones, got to pierce their ears while being under 18/still living at home, got my mom to buy them CDs every week (I wanted comics/manga [Japanese comics] and my mom never brought me one... and they were cheaper too), and among other things. My sister also had a lawsuit with a car insurance company and won a large among of money, which was used to pay for college and her car... she had also saved money from work, so my parents didn't need to help her when it came to this moment in her life. On top of that by that time my parents couldn't afford to help her. She was forced to get a job because she wanted to home school and my mom warned her that was going to happen. My sister made that choice, not my parents. Anytime she asked my parents for money for food or any kind of help, it usually turns out she needed it for a tattoo that she didn't need at that moment or most likely drugs (yes I know she's doing drugs... seen it at her place and she admits it too). Of course, after awhile people will say no to the borrowing if they know it's not for a needed thing. Though my parents did borrow money from her to help them get their current house, with the history of her blowing thousands of dollars away so fast, of course, my parents are afraid to give her money back so fast (well first off they don't really have the money to give anyways).
My parents may not be perfect, no one is, but to lie so much about not getting any kind of help is unbelievable. Be happy you had a place to call home, a bed to sleep in, a roof over your head, clothes on your person, and food on your plate, you ungrateful brat.
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